My final exams are only days away. It's a lot of pressure but I'm finding it hard to study. I'm used to studying only a few days in advance, and if given more than a week, it's inevitably wasted. I just can't concentrate. The extra time would help me a great deal if I actually studied, but I cannot motivate myself enough to stay focused. I'm constantly distracted, and bore myself to sleep if the computer is turned on. And even if I do get motivated, the boost begins to fade with every minute of study. How do I stop procrastinating and how do I stay focused?
Well, it is hard to do something in which we are not interested. No amount of time will improve motivation, as you say. Nowadays, most 'learning' is not learning at all but rather merely remembering and 'mugging'. That is not terribly exciting, is it? If you have to study just to get good grades it's not that attractive. But if you decide to study in order to get something out of it besides mere grades, perhaps you will find the motivation you need. The only solution is to begin, give yourself short breaks and actually learn something!
I finished my +2 last year and am planning to study in Nepal for my further education. But all my friends are heading to the US or UK or other foreign nations. I gave the SAT and other examinations needed to go to the US, but had to cancel my plans when I didn't get enough scholarship. Now that all my friends are leaving I feel lonely, even inferior to them. Is it something I should do too?
It would be helpful to know why you feel inferior, as no doubt you are intelligent enough. In these days of the credit crunch, there are fewer scholarships available. Some can afford to make up the difference, some cannot. Good luck to your friends and do your best here in Nepal. It is not that you are not qualified; you just don't have the means to study abroad right now. You need to make the best of the academic situation here and shine here.
My girlfriend and I have been together for the last three years and we've known each other for a total of eleven years. I've recently started a new job and haven't managed to attend to her properly like I used to before. Now, she is having trust issues. We have loads of fights because she thinks I am lying most of the time. What do I do?
First of all, what does she think you are lying about? Your business or your activities, or what? Here we have a clash between what is possible and what both of you need. The only solution is good, healthy, honest communication. It is best not to use the pronoun 'you' when talking but rather use 'I', as in 'I need this' or 'I want that'. This is much better than saying, 'Why don't you do this or that?', which is very threatening. Show your concern about her concerns and see where she is really coming from: let her know that you are and will remain faithful to your relationship, no matter what.
L.V. Brooks
Sirjana Singh
