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EVEn ISSUES
Let’s face it; women have been treated as sexual objects for centuries.
by SHWETA KOIRALA AND VIKASH PRADHAN
| FROM ISSUE # 81 (September 2002) | IN THIS ISSUE | |||
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I'm hurrying down the road, late for work. To make matters worse, I can't get hold of any transportation. So there I am, praying for time to stand still. From nowhere a guy blocks my path and starts sweet talking. My attempts to get away from him are futile. He is quickly joined by his other friends who start the usual whistling and clapping. After a royal shout, I walk away, of course with no hope of reaching work on time. The guys are celebrating their little "timepass". Sounds familiar doesn't it, this little scene that takes place almost everywhere in Nepal? Eve-teasing, that's what we call it and it seems to be a constant problem. Eve-teasing is a kind of sexual harrassment. It differs from outright sexual assault only in degree, because both acts take place without the consent of the victim. For too long subjects like sexual harassment has been swept under the carpet. We come across everyday situations where women are teased, harassed and sometimes even physcially abused. What goes unaccounted for is the bad psychological effect on the girl. This problem has to be stopped. But the question is HOW? Shouting slogans and holding demonstrations are not the only solutions. We have to understand that this kind of deep-rooted problem is a parasite to our society and cannot be tackled by the law or police alone. WAVE got together with a small group to discuss the issue. They told us their views and opinions on the topic. The participants WAVE: How do you react to it? WAVE: If there had been an option that you could use, a place where you could lodge a complaint, would you use it? WAVE: If someone were to start abusing you for the way you are dressed up, how would you take it? Do you think there should be a place and a way of lodging complaints about such instances? WAVE (To Santosh): Do you have friends who tease and harass girls? WAVE: So a girl dressed in a kurtha has a lesser chance of getting teased. Why do you think a skirt attracts more attention than a kurtha? WAVE (To Santosh): How short is too short for you? Looking at a girl wearing a mini skirt would you be distracted? WAVE: You work both in and out of Kathmandu. What do you think is the reason for eve-teasing? WAVE: What do you think is the best way to deal with eve-teasing and harassment? WAVE: How big an issue is eve-teasing? On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate it? So there you have it, the views of a few on eve-teasing and sexual harassment. What's surprising is the youth of today don't think it's such a big problem. The reason could be that they haven't yet faced extreme degrees of harassment. The fact that it's not an issue is an issue in itself. All of us, men and women, have to realise that eve-teasing and sexual harassment are serious topics. The cultural norms which surround women have to change. Everybody wants a free and happy life. Why exclude women?
Santosh (Graduate),
Pratibha (Graduate),
Irada (Save the children - U.K.),
Rojina (Graduate),
Shodashi (A Masters Student) and
Sabeena (Save the children - U.K.)
WAVE: How much of eve-teasing do you face in your day-to-day life? 
Rojina/ Pratibha: Occasionally. It takes place more on the roads of busy areas like Thamel. Generally it's light teasing, which at times boosts the morale knowing that you are being noticed. However, there are occasional times when people resort to verbal abuse. That is bad.
Rojina: It happens mainly when we are alone. It is the clothes we wear that actually triggers it. The level of teasing is very low when wearing a salwar-kameez compared to when you are wearing sleeveless tops, spaghetti tops and tank tops.
Rojina/ Shodashi: We just ignore them. Trying to stand up to them aggravates the situation. They generally hang out in groups and that is another reason why we don't face them.
Rojina: If things were to go overboard I would go and complain. If it were just some minor teasing then I would let it go.
WAVE: Do you face any sort of harassment in college? 
Rojina/ Pratibha: Eve-teasing in our college is negligible. Some teachers do pass a comment or two but it depends on the way you are dressed. If the attire is not appropriate for college, like mini skirts, spaghetti tops, then they comment on it.
Shodashi: During my school days, boys used to follow our school bus. Being in high school, we used to enjoy the attention. In college I realized that the way you dress was one reason why you got teased. I guess eve-teasing is a general phenomenon, a part of life and unless someone crosses the limit, it's okay and one has to face it. No teacher has teased me so far. You have to be aware of the expected dress code and as long as you follow it, the chances of you getting teased are quite low. The situation in Tribhuvan University (T.U.) is pretty bad, just a sleeveless top can make guys turn around and stare at you. In college, a sleeveless was never taken as something extraordinary but in T.U, it's as if you are wearing something revealing.
Shodashi: It would definitely not be okay. It is harassment. We need a means or a place to seek redressal for eve-teasing and harassment and had there been any such place, I would have taken help from there.
Santosh: None of my friends are into teasing and harassing but I have seen people who do it. These are issues which have been taking place for a long time. In a closed society like ours, I think it is a form of communication and unless it exceeds the limit, I guess its fine. They (girls) are basically drawing attention to themselves; it is a ploy to get noticed. The clothes girls wear and the way they present themselves also account for it.
Santosh: That again depends on the person concerned.
WAVE: Which or what was the worst scene of eve-teasing that you have witnessed?
Santosh: I was with a few of my friends during a street festival. While on the road, a couple of them were trying to get in physical contact with the girls. I found it very offensive and disgusting.
WAVE (To Sabeena & Irada): Is eve-teasing mostly a teenage phenomenon? 
Sabeena: As far as my own experience goes, I don't think it is only a teenage issue. It is something that women as a whole face. The question is why should we feel embarrassed instead of angry?
WAVE: How short is short?
Rojina / Pratibha/ Shodashi: Knee-length.
Santosh: No, I would get attracted. It is for the girl to decide. If she is okay with people staring at her due to the clothes that she is wearing, what problems can I have?
WAVE (To Irada): In our society, how short is acceptable? 
Irada: It would be difficult to state a particular length as acceptable. Nepal has a diverse society with different levels of openness and acceptance. As for Kathmandu, the society is quite liberal and open so a mini skirt is pretty okay here, whereas in some areas in Nepal, even a skirt is not yet accepted.
Irada: The main reason is the general attitude towards women. Even today, they are looked down upon by men and are considered nothing but mere sex objects. Just being a woman is enough to invite men to tease and harass them. The male child is brought up with extra privileges, while the female child is restricted in almost every step of her life. Men end up feeling they can get away with almost anything while it is just the opposite for women. They feel guilty for no fault of theirs, refusing to complain even when they are mistreated. The confidence level in our women is rather low.
Irada: Our experience has shown that support groups are the best way to deal with that problem. The basic essence of support groups is sharing, which in itself is a form of therapy. The members get together, talk about their experiences, initiate dialogue as well as take part in confidence and awareness building activities. When a girl tries to bring up the issue of being teased with her seniors, they very often transfer some part of the blame to the victim. That is one reason why cases go unreported and action is not taken. There are good men as well so the support groups should include them too.
WAVE: What is the state of affairs in the rural areas? 
Irada: Unsolicited letters and obscene graffiti is a major problem in schools in rural areas. I have seen instances when even passing by certain areas is a problem for girls due to the obscenity splattered on the walls.
Santosh: I feel that despite a change in the political system in our country, the society has not changed. The old mindset and the attitudes are still prevalent.
Santosh: Discrimination towards women is the root problem; eve-teasing is just an offshoot. If I had to rate it, I would rate it at 3 or 4.
Shodashi/Rojina/ Pratibha: 5
Irada/Sabeena: 9
GIRLS NATIONAL EVENT: AGENTS OF CHANGE
To convey a message that individuals and groups must take responsibility of procative action against incidents against women, Save The Children (U.K) is organizing a National Level Girls' Event. It will be held on Saturday, October 5th, 2002 at the Birendra International Convention Centre, Kathmandu. The concept for the event will revolve around the idea of 'agents of change'.
It will give a chance to young people to come together and explore, discuss as well as understand the issue of harassment and abuse. A public call to join the forum will be out to all young people through the existing school, child club networks, media, flyer and poster distribution, word-of-mouth and volunteers.
The forum will constitute of three support groups, one each from Surkhet, Damauli and Kathmandu, guided by a Master of Ceremonies. There will be discussion and question answer sessions between the participants as well as with policymakers, lawmakers and the police.